


Just Roommates

by flyingfoxtopus



Series: Just Life [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Bisexual Bucky Barnes, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Bisexuality, Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, Friends to Lovers, Multi, Polyamory, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Roommates, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:48:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22382101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flyingfoxtopus/pseuds/flyingfoxtopus
Summary: Bucky's life has been complicated since 'the shit hit the fan'. The world is too much a lot of the time. His ruined shoulder aches when he gets cold. Doing anything one handed is irritating. People stare and he hates it.He takes things one day at a time. Goes to therapy. Braves the outside world. Trys not to let things paralyse him. He relies on his friends.He has the best friends. Sam, his therapy group, Peggy with her unchanging affection, and most of all Steve.Steve the best roommate anyone could ask for. Steve who pulled him back from the dark place and helped him get back on his feet. Steve with his storybook perfect relationship that never gets in the way of looking out for his best friend.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers
Series: Just Life [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2026046
Comments: 8
Kudos: 69





	1. June 26th- July 5th

Figuring out how to configure his game controller so he could play with essentially one hand had taken the better part of a day and it was clunky enough that he couldn’t manage anything other than normal mode without dying all the time, hell, he still died all the time, but Bucky was loving his ridiculous cowboy video game. He’d always loved video games. He couldn’t handle most of the shooter games he used to play, but so far, this one wasn’t hitting any of his panic buttons.  
  
In the three years since 'the shit hit the fan' as Bucky euphemistically called the worst day of his life, Bucky had struggled to find things that didn’t push at least some of his buttons. People staring at his prosthetic arm. Enclosed spaces. Areas with no cover. Crowds. Spaces without enough people. Loud traffic. Empty streets. Basically, everything rubbed Bucky the wrong way if he wasn’t properly prepared for it.  
  
Bucky swore as one of the bandits he was fighting threw a stick of dynamite at him. The sound of the explosion hardly made him twitch, it sounded good, but it didn’t sound real. He was doing pretty well these days, thanks to a great therapist, and an amazing roommate.  
  
Steve had been Bucky’s friend since they were kids, best friends all through high school, they had enlisted at the same time. Steve had been tapped for officer training and Bucky had proved he was natural born sniper. The army had been good to both of them for years. Steve had gotten a degree form West Point. Bucky had honed his skills and earned every ticket he could. They had raised absolute hell anytime they’d had space to breath, and sometimes even when they didn’t.  
  
Then 'the shit had hit the fan'. Bucky had originally been tapped to go out with Steve’s team that day. Sometimes, when things were bad, Bucky wondered what would have happened if the plan hadn’t changed at the last minute.  
  
They had changed. It was one of the first things his therapist had him come to terms with. Bucky had ended up getting sent home with a chest full of shiny new medals, shoulder full of shrapnel, and an experimental prosthetic hand. Moving back in with his parents in his late twenties had been a blow to his already bruised pride. A situation made even worse by the fact his parents had moved out of New York once their children had grown up. Leaving the best city in the world for the town his father had grown up in. His parents had been prepared to look after his father’s parents, but no one had ever thought they would need to look after him again. Moving in with his parents had only been a better idea than trying to look after himself. Bucky still had no idea how he made it a year in his parent’s guest bedroom. Between the interminable silence of small-town USA and the constant worried fluttering of his mother, Bucky had been seriously considering self-medicating himself into a coma.  
  
Thankfully, Steve had seen exactly how much Bucky was suffering the first time he had come to visit. He cashed in his chips, something he repeatedly reassured Bucky he had been planning to do anyway, and the two of them had moved into a shoebox sized two-bedroom apartment in their native Brooklyn. Steve started a job with Stark Industries less than a week after they made the move, which helped Bucky almost believe he really had been planning to retire.  
  
Things were better in Brooklyn. There was always something going on, but no one ever insisted Bucky join in on whatever it was. New Yorkers didn’t stare, the ability to ignore pretty much anything was part of their identity. Bucky rarely broke the top ten strangest things on the Subway when he ventured underground. There was a drop-in VA group session pretty much every day for when Bucky needed a therapy top up. Plus, Bucky’s great no nonsense therapist was here. Top it all off with the ability to get pretty much anything delivered right to the door and Bucky couldn’t think of anywhere he’d rather live.  
  
There was definitely no one he'd rather live with. Bucky’s mood lifted a little as he heard a key in the door.  
  
“Did you leave the apartment today.” Steve called as he kicked off his shoes. His customary greeting. Steve always worried about Bucky isolating himself. Something Bucky couldn’t resent him for, since he kind of was.  
  
“If you check the fridge you will find I made it all the way to the bodega.” Bucky called back. Bucky was putting a real effort into listening to both Steve and his therapist and getting out into the world.  
  
The sound of the fridge opening reached Bucky on the couch. Steve was checking his story. “And bought four cartons of chocolate milk I see. We’re grown ups Buck. We should at least try to eat like it.”  
  
Bucky knew Steve wasn’t actually upset. He liked chocolate milk too. They would go through it. “You’re home late. What kept you?”  
  
Steve proved he was all talk on the milk front by setting two full glasses on the coffee table, one commemorative Dodgers glass, one spill proof Rangers cup with a straw. “Tony wants to throw me a birthday party.”  
  
“That sounds awful.” Bucky said spurring his horse alongside a train. He missed the jump to actually board the train, his character inexplicably leaping in the other direction and rolling down a short hill. Bucky blamed fiddly proximity cues, not himself.  
  
Steve shrugged and took a sip of his milk. Steve was better in crowds than Bucky was these days, but his friend hadn’t exactly been a social butterfly even back before ‘the shit hit the fan’. “He said he'd fly Peggy over for it.”  
  
Bucky paused his game and grabbed his phone off the table. Peggy had been an intelligence officer when Steve had first met her, and he'd been hopelessly in love with ever since. A six-year long distance relationship, law school, nothing had shaken the two of them. Steve would jump at any chance to see his girl.  
  
Steve looked over the rim of his glass at Bucky, eyebrows raised. “What are you doing?  
  
Bucky smirked, but didn’t look up from his phone. Steve should know exactly what he was doing. He was getting ready to go to a Tony Stark party at the start of next month. “Googling where to rent a tux. I’m not gonna show up to your birthday party under dressed.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve had to work the day Peggy was due to fly in, something he couldn’t get out of since he needed to clear off his desk before he took the rest of the week off. Peggy had assured him that it was fine she would take a cab. Steve still hated the idea of her not having anyone to great her when she arrived. Bucky had said he would do it. His therapist was always encouraging him to try and spend more time in crowds. Which was how Bucky found himself standing in the arrivals lounge at JFK holding a sign with a red hat drawn on it.  
  
The hat was an inside joke. Peggy’s red hat had been a thrift store find that she had fallen in love with and had worn it her entire final year of law school. It was one of the dozens of adorable moments that made up Steve and Peggy’s relationship. Steve had been on leave. Peggy had been about to start her fall term. They had visited Camden Market. Peggy had fallen in love with the hat but hadn’t bought it because it was too expensive. Steve had gone back later and surprised her with it. Just another example of their fairy tale love. The practically of wearing a hat combined with a new high stress job meant she hadn’t actually worn it in years. She claimed she still had it in a box, and Steve still used it as shorthand for her. Bucky ran through the exact story and how Steve told it at dinner parties, instead of searching the crowded terminal for threats.  
  
“James!” Peggy threw her arms around Bucky’s neck and hugged him tight. He had been too distracted to notice her approach. Anyone one else that would make him uneasy, but not Peggy.  
  
Bucky wrapped his good arm around her and spun them in a little circle. God, it was good to have her here. Peggy was always sensitive to his needs, but never precious with him. Really, Peggy was uniquely perfect in a number of ways. “You know you’re the only one who calls me that right? Like not even my Ma calls me James. It is you, and people reading my name off official forms.”  
  
“I know. I like having something that is just between us.” Peggy smoothed her hair and plucked the sign out of his fingers. Bucky would never admit it, but he liked it too. “Are you and artist now too?”  
  
“Nah. Your boy drew that. I'm just cheaper than an easel.” Bucky laughed keeping his arm around her neck. It was as much a gesture of familiarity as it was an effort to keep himself anchored. The crowd was starting to get to him. Still, better part of an hour, the doc would be proud. “Do you have a checked bag, or can we get out of here?”  
  
Peggy wrapped her arm around his waist protectively. “I’m not such a clothes horse that I need more than a carry-on for five days. Let’s get back to Brooklyn.”  
  
Bucky smiled and steered them towards the taxi stand. A carry-on, a garment bag, and a drawer full of clothes in Steve’s dresser. Peggy liked clothes and she looked good wearing them. Bucky approved. She had spent too many years in olive drab. Bright colours and soft fabrics were a better fit for her personality.  
  
*****  
  
Peggy was perfectly at home in Steve and Bucky’s apartment. She should be since she had visited four or five times a year since they'd moved in. As soon as they were through the door, she kicked her heels off and headed straight for the kitchen. Bucky could hear her rummaging around while he carefully untied his own shoes. Fretting about their diet was her favourite way to settle in.  
  
“Have you boys ever considered getting adult dishes.” She called, evidently not pleased with what she found.  
  
“You don’t like the commemorative Star Wars bowl and plate combo?” He called back. She never was, or at least she pretended not to be. “Try the cupboard above the sink. I prefer something more durable for everyday though.”  
  
It wasn’t the first time they’d had this conversation, and it wouldn’t be the last. Chuckling, Bucky carried Peggy’s bag into Steve’s room. It was kind of nice having a girl in the house. There was no denying that Steve and Bucky lived like savages when she wasn’t around.  
  
Peggy leaned against the door-frame smiling at him indulgently. “What about vegetables? Do you break those too or is there another reason you don’t have any in the house?”  
  
Bucky grinned back as innocently as he could many. Seriously how did they survive between Peggy's visits? “Did you check the freezer?”  
  
Steve can home to them both sitting on the couch eating pizza off napkins. Vegetable pizza. Peggy could be a _little_ savage herself.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky leaned against the bar in the Stark penthouse. Trying and failing to watch the crowd without checking for threats. It was a very glamorous, sparkly, crowd, all happy and boisterous. Which translated to his brain as loud and hectic. Bucky couldn’t help noticing, that for his best friend’s birthday party, he didn’t know most of these people. He had to make it one more hour, then he could tell Steve he was heading home without feeling bad. Ice cubes clinked as he swirled his glass, soda and lime made him look like an adult, without any of the risk associate with him consuming alcohol. Bucky and depressants didn’t mix. Bucky and recreational mood-altering substances of any kind didn’t mix. His therapist has spent too much time perfecting the cocktail of drugs that kept him functional for him to mess it up for a few hours of potential fun. The crash just wasn’t worth it.  
  
Steve’s co-workers, the ones he did recognise, sidled up next to him. They hadn’t met often, but they knew him well enough to remember not to sneak up on him. Or maybe Stark had briefed the guests on Steve’s jumpy friend. There was no denying that Tony was always good about PTSD. The curly haired man in a purple tie leaned in close, looking between Bucky and the dancefloor. “Who is that?”  
  
Doctor Banner, from the medical research division, Bucky reminded himself. He was pretty sure he knew who the doctor was asking about. But it never hurt to get confirmation. And if he could tweak the other man’s tale at the same time. Well, Bucky had to amuse himself somehow. “The bombshell dancing with Steve?”  
  
“I mean… I wouldn’t…” The doctor sputtered and blushed.  
  
Natasha, Stark’s personal assistant and Bucky’s favourite of Steve’s work friends, smacked Bucky lightly on the arm. The prosthetic specifically. She wasn’t scared of it. That was one of the reasons she was his favourite. “Stop teasing Bruce. He's easily flustered.”  
  
Bucky grinned at her. The red head took no shit and never treated him with kid gloves the way other people sometimes did. Another point in her favour. “I regret nothing.”  
  
“So, who is she?” Natasha asked raising her eyebrows. She was new enough that she had missed the last party Steve had dragged Peggy to.  
  
“Steve’s girlfriend.” Bucky said evenly. He would have thought it was obvious. Steve and Peggy absolutely glowed when they were around each other. They had that magnetic aura of soulmates around them anytime they were in the same room. Somehow, people were still surprised the first time they met Peggy.  
  
The doctor blinked, doing double take. Bucky, Steve, Peggy, back to Bucky. “Steve’s… but I thought…”  
  
Bucky knew that confused look. The good doctor had thought he and Steve were an item. Something people were guessing more and more these days. He blamed the mother hen, wrap him in bubble wrap, overprotective attitude Steve had when it came to him. Their tactile affection with one another and the fact they were grown men living together in one of the most progressive cities in the country probably didn’t help either. Or Steve’s place on the Stark pride float last year.  
  
Not that Bucky _wouldn’t_ date Steve. He sipped his drink to give himself a second. The opportunity had just never presented itself. Getting laid by anyone, but especially by someone like Steve, was part of his old life. And Bucky hadn’t made a move when he’d had the chance. Bucky hadn’t really been the type to settle down before 'the shit hit the fan'. They had been friends for so long he hadn’t considered it before Peggy came into their lives. As soon as she had, Steve had fallen head over heels for her. Which Bucky got. Peggy was great. Smart, gorgeous, with that razor-sharp sarcastic whit that was so characteristically British. She was the only person he had ever considered really worthy of Steve.  
  
He raised his eyebrows at Doctor Banner, wondering if the nervous man would finish the thought or just let it trail off. He wasn’t about to put him out of his misery by correcting him without actually being asked. Call him vain, but he liked that people could still make the mistake.  
  
Bucky stirred a lime wedge around his soda and wondered if he could get away with cutting that hour down to 45 minutes or if Steve would be worried and try to go home with him. He didn’t want to cut into Steve’s fun. Especially when he rarely got to do this sort of thing with Peggy. But fancy parties were a lot less fun when you didn’t drink, didn’t like crowds, and didn’t have a date to flirt with. Pre 'the shit hit the fan' Bucky would have been the life of the party. He would be owning the dancefloor with a pretty girl on his arm and a grin on his face. Post fan Bucky always spent these things brooding in the corner trying not to look so uncomfortable that Steve felt the need to protect him.  
  
Doctor Banner cleared his throat and complimented Natasha on her dress. An awkward attempted to change the topic, but Bucky would let him get away with it. Natasha’s dress was very nice.  
  
Bucky joined in their small talk for another few minutes. The end of the bar was a good location for him. Clear sight lines, nearby cover, and a straight route to the exit just behind him. Talking to Steve’s work friends meant he could stay here without feeling like he was hiding. He wasn’t hiding. He was full on socialising, with a few coping strategies in place to help him. His therapist would be so proud.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky whimpered and curled into a tighter ball. Everything was going wrong again. Explosions. Gun fire. Flashing lights. Faces loomed over him, their features morphing grotesquely. Blood. So much blood. The pain in his left hand was excruciating. Burning and freezing at the same time. The worst part was he couldn’t get away. He couldn’t even move.  
  
“James. Wake up. It’s just a nightmare.” A sweet British accent called Bucky back from the pit he was falling into.  
  
“Peggy?” Bucky struggled out of the fog of sleep.  
  
A delicate hand stroked his hair. Long soothing strokes. “Yes, love. We’re in your apartment in Brooklyn. Nothing bad is going to happen to you here.”  
  
Bucky rubbed his eyes. Someone had briefed her on what to do when he started screaming in the night. He appreciated that, but it did raise the question of why she was the one looking after him and not his usual mother hen. “Where’s Steve?”  
“He had a work emergency and had to go in for a couple of hours. Something to do with the Berlin office.” Peggy said absently as she studied his face. Bucky was surprised by how much worry there was in her eyes. Peggy clearly cared about how he was doing, and not just because she was dating his best friend. “Do you want to come sleep in our bed? I know you crawl in with Steve after particularly bad ones.”  
  
Bucky snorted and tried to stretch out some of the tightness in his neck. Now there was an idea. Crawl into bed with the amazing girl his best friend was crazy about. Nothing bad about that idea. “That’s a little different. Steve and I have been sharing a bed since we were kids.”  
  
Peggy held her hand out to him. “Come on. He won’t mind, and it is strange sleeping in Steve’s bed alone.”  
  
“You get to explain if he asks.” Bucky grumbled, but slipped his hand into hers. He hated being alone after a nightmare.  
  
Peggy pulled him in closer so she could wrap herself around his arm. “Of course, darling.”  
  
Falling asleep next to Peggy was easier than he had thought it would be. Her presence was warm and soft. Everything about her was so inherently feminine. The scent of her shampoo wafting gently off her hair. The silky sound of her pyjamas when she shifted. Even her breathing. Bucky couldn’t remember the last time he’d fallen asleep in the same bed as a girl. He was pretty sure it hadn’t felt like this.  
  
******  
  
The mattress dipping as someone large perched on the edge was the next thing to wake Bucky. He opened his eyes to find Steve looking down at him curiously. Curiosity wasn’t the first emotion Bucky would have gone with if he had found his best friend snoring next to his girlfriend, but Steve had always been a better person than Bucky.  
  
“Had a nightmare. Peggy said it was okay.” Bucky mumbled in sleepy explanation.  
  
“Of course, it is okay. Just shove over so I fit too.” Steve sounded tired but happy. He hadn’t bothered to change back into his pyjamas, instead he’d just peeled off his work clothes leaving him in boxers and an under shirt. Whatever it was that had dragged him out of bed in the middle of the night it must have resolved reasonably well. If it hadn’t Steve would have showered and changed to settle his mind. Bucky liked shower warm Steve. He had been known to find his way into Steve’s bed just because he heard the water running in the middle or the night. Not that he would ever admit to it.  
  
Bucky shifted closer to Peggy, who grumbled without waking up and curled herself around his arm. Bucky felt guilty until Steve draped an arm across him, so his hand was resting on her side. It was fine. Steve knew he didn’t have to worry about Bucky making a move on Peggy, or about Peggy looking at anyone other than Steve, because really who would want someone else if they had Steve. They both worried and wanted him to feel safe. Human contact made him feel safe.


	2. August 8th- September 26th

Steve was on his laptop in kitchen when Bucky got home from physical therapy. Brow creased with worry, drumming his fingers on the table next to the computer. Bucky knew that look. Steve was trying to process something. Something big from the look of it. Big could be a lot of things where Steve was concerned. Steve’s therapist could have asked to reschedule an appointment. Something could have happened with the Stark rapid transit project in Seoul. Peggy could have sent him an email venting about her work. Hell, knowing Steve it could just be the news.  
  
Bucky dropped onto the couch without saying anything. The apartment was small. From the end of the couch Bucky could reach out and flick Steve in the ear if he wanted to. He didn’t want to just now. He sipped his coconut water and waited. Steve would tell him what was bugging him when he was ready.  
  
Today was a good day to tell him things. The massage at the end of PT had left all his muscles lose and relaxed. Before that, he’d gone to one of Sam's group sessions at the VA. He hadn’t talked today just sat and nodded companionably at the other people who were like him. It was amazing what a nod from the right person could do. That little head bob of 'I see you, I get it, you’re not alone'. There had been a couple of people who had needed that nod today. That was probably why Sam had called and asked him to come.  
  
Steve cleared his throat. Bucky set down his drink and turned towards him. Steve was ready. “It looks like Peggy might be transferring to the New York office.”  
  
“That’s great.” Bucky smiled. It was great. Steve and Peggy were great. This was the next step on the road to them getting married and having 2.5 children. No white picket fence. Neither of them would want to move out of the city. A fairy tale ending for the fairy tale couple. Bucky was so happy for them. He might also need to schedule a couple extra therapy seasons for himself, but he was happy.  
  
“I think I’m going to ask her to move in.” Steve said studying Bucky’s face for his reaction.  
  
Bucky nodded understanding. This would be an awkward conversation for Steve. He’d been the one to ask Bucky to move to New York. He probably felt like he was abandoning Bucky. He wasn’t, he was living his life. Wasn’t that why they’d joined the army in the first place? So people could live their lives. “You have to. Don’t worry. I’m sure I can find somewhere. There is that veterans building Sam's always talking about over in Queens for starters.”  
  
Steve looked up sharply, his expression confused. “I’m not asking you to find another place Buck. God. You living on your own... You’d forget to eat half the time, let alone leave the apartment.”  
  
Steve had a point he had been known to turn into a hermit when Steve wasn’t around. The last time Steve had gone to London he had come home to a mountain of half empty delivery containers and a roommate that hadn’t showered in the better part of a week.  
  
That didn’t mean he could ask Peggy to move in with them here. Their apartment sucked. You couldn’t do dishes and open the fridge at the same time. The tap in the bathroom dripped and you basically had to sit with your feet in the shower to use the toilet. There was mold in the stairwell. He was pretty sure that the guy that lived down the hall was a Russian mobster, although that could be paranoia. Visiting was one thing, but Bucky couldn’t let Steve bring Peggy home to this long term. He loved them both too much for that. They needed something that people would call a home, not a ‘pad’ of some description.  
  
“Peggy knows you are part of the package. I was thinking we could move, all of us. I know you like this apartment, but with three people we're going to want another bathroom, and with the extra income we can afford a better place. Maybe something with a balcony, or a dishwasher.” Steve smiled coaxingly at Bucky.  
  
“Fuck. A dishwasher?” Bucky hated washing dishes. His prosthetic didn’t have the dexterity to hold slippery dishes and he always ended up splashing himself.  
  
“Maybe.” Steve shrugged. On the screen behind him, Bucky could see a real estate website full of listings. He was already looking. Which meant he had already figured out what their budget was and what they could expect to get with it.  
  
Bucky scrambled for his own laptop. If they could afford a dishwasher, they could probably also afford a working elevator. Not having to walk up five flights of stairs at the end of a long day, that was the dream. “What website are you using? I don’t want to cover the same ground.”  
  
Steve told him and Bucky quickly started his own hunt for their new home. Good neighbourhood, preferably close to the train. Two bedrooms was good, three would be better, Peggy would home office. Two bathrooms, one could be an ensuite. Between the fourth and eighth floor if they could get it. Lower than that freaked Bucky out, higher and Steve got nervous near the edge. A balcony or a terrace. And a good-sized kitchen, somewhere he could cook instead of them relying on take out the way they did, one _with a dishwasher_.  
  
An hour later Bucky’s head snapped up, pieces clicking into place. He hadn’t been this slow before ‘the shit hit the fan’ either. “You told Sam before you told me.”  
  
Steve blushed, his ears going bright red. More than enough conformation for Bucky. “We were talking about our support networks in group. I may have mentioned that I didn’t want to risk losing you for a chance to move in with Peggy and probably screw up our relationship.”  
  
Something fluttered in Bucky’s chest. Steve didn’t blush easily. Bucky was pretty sure you could count on one hand the number of people who had seen his big tough friend show weakness like this. Peggy, Sam, maybe Stark, his therapist, but being weak around your therapist didn’t count, that was what they were for. And Bucky. He couldn’t think of anyone else, not since Steve had lost his mother. Being included on that list made Bucky feel warm all over. Bucky didn’t have a lot of strength to give other people, but he would give it all to Steve.  
  
“You’re not going to screw it up. You and Peggy are the real deal.” Bucky clasped Steve’s arm. Putting as much affection into the touch as he could. “Just you know, communicate and shit.”  
  
Steve laughed and squeezed Bucky’s shoulder in return. It had always been the two of them against the world. Now it would be the three of them. Bucky wasn’t going to let Steve mess things up with Peggy. They were too perfect together.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky had accepted that he wasn’t going to pay an equal share of rent. He tried not to feel guilty. He might not have a high-powered job like Steve or Peggy, but he had an income. A part time work from home proof reading thing. He could work as many hours as he wanted without leaving the apartment. He only averaged about four hours a day, but it was still work and he should be proud of it. He was proud of it. He might not be a brainiac like Steve and Peggy, but he was smart, and good with language.  
  
And he definitely wasn’t going to complain if it meant he got to live in this palace of an apartment. Three bedrooms, two baths. A huge open plan kitchen and living room with two walls of floor to ceiling windows that looked out over the river. A small terrace with a view of the Brooklyn bridge. They had a dishwasher _and_ a washer dryer. Genius negotiator that she was, Peggy had wrangled a decorating budget as part of her relocation package. They had new furniture. A dining room table and chairs in soft grey wood. Matching bookshelves and a coffee table. A big low couch that looked stylish while still fitting all three of them comfortably for movie night. Even when Steve lounged across two thirds of the thing, Bucky and Peggy had developed a system to deal with the couch hog years ago. Bucky took the other end, then Peggy half sat in Steve’s lap with her legs across Bucky’s knees. She was better than a blanket for keeping him warm and Bucky appreciated the way the easy contact had never changed even when he had. He even had his own bathroom. One with a shower big enough to turn around in.  
  
Just because he couldn’t match them financially, didn’t mean he couldn’t pull his weight. In the two months they had been living here, he had appointed himself chef and maid. Trying to do most the cooking and cleaning for all three of them.  
  
Cleaning was easy. None of them were exactly slobs. Bucky could vacuum and wash bathrooms without too much trouble. Dishes were a dream with the dishwasher. Laundry had been awkward at first, but once he had figured out a solution to Peggy’s delicates it had been reasonably straight forward. She put them all in the little net bag, he washed the bag in cold water with the other colours, and left it sitting damp in the sink in the master bedroom for her to hang when she got home, it worked. He’d been ironing Steve’s shirts for years, so that was fine.  
  
The cooking was a bit more of an adventure. The kitchen in the old apartment had been too small for them to do much, so they hadn’t bothered. He had a few dishes that he was good at, but they couldn’t live on chicken soup and tuna casserole. Thankfully the internet had his back. It took planning and prep work to get everything done at the same time. There had been a few nights where they had eaten in what Steve euphemistically called courses, when the protein, vegetables, and carbs were done at wildly different times. It was a learning curve, one his therapist whole heartedly approved of.  
  
Tonight’s dinner looked like it was going to work. Water for pasta was coming to a boil, his sauce was almost done, the salad was ready and waiting in the fridge. And Peggy should be walking through the door any minute now.  
  
Right on cue the door opened, and Bucky heard the sound of Peggy’s purse hitting the floor, followed by the double thunk of her kicking off her heels. They had a hall table and a bench. She never used them.  
  
She stretched as she drifted into the kitchen, looking elegantly dishevelled after a long day of international contract law. “Something smells good.”  
  
“Pasta Al Limone.” Bucky said offering her his spoon. Peggy hummed contentedly as she tasted the sauce. Bucky grinned, this cooking thing was pretty fun. He wouldn’t lie, he was always a slut for positive reinforcement, and Steve and Peggy knew how to deliver. “Grab one of those fancy plates of yours.”  
  
“And your plastic Star Wars bowl.” Peggy teased opening the cupboard next to Bucky’s head. She stabilised herself with a hand on his shoulder. Bucky wondered if they should rearrange where they kept things, so they were easier for her to reach. He and Steve were tall enough that they didn’t notice when things they needed were on an upper shelf. Petite little Pegs would, and Bucky didn’t want her to have to drag a stool out for stuff she needed all the time.  
  
“You laugh, but that bowl has served me well.” Bucky said solemnly. They could have a conversation about how accessible their kitchen was the next time they were all home for dinner.  
  
“No Steve tonight?” Peggy asked scanning the living room. The first week Bucky started cooking, he had also trained Steve to say out of the kitchen and not hover looking for snacks before the meal was ready. He’s normal place on the couch was desolate without him sprawled across it.  
  
Bucky shook his head. Steve had texted twenty minutes ago to let him know that he would be working late. Something to do with the Sokovia project going of the rails and Steve having to do damage control. From the tone of his message and the number of spelling mistakes, Bucky wasn’t sure if he’d be back before midnight. When Stark’s pet project went of the rails, they tended to go way off the rails.  
  
Peggy sighed and grabbed cutlery and glasses. “You would think I’d see him more now that we live together.”  
  
“You knew he was a workaholic.” Bucky chided setting a pitcher of water on the table.  
  
Peggy leaned against his side as he finished dishing the pasta and salad onto plates. Leaving the salad off of one, to cover and put in the fridge. Steve could reheat it when he did make it home. Peggy stole one of his croutons. “At least I have you to come home to. I am so tired of being surrounded by idiots.”  
  
“Long day at work, doll?” Bucky muttered shifting so her head was cradled on his shoulder. Poor girl was more stressed as a lawyer than she ever had been in the service.  
  
Peggy let out a long, exasperated, sigh and turned into his hold. “I genuinely had a client ask if he really had to meet EU standards if he wanted to export to Spain. He runs a multi-million-dollar company. He should be smarter than this. Then he asked me to be quiet while the men discussed details when I tried to explain.”  
  
Bucky wrapped her in a hug. “Want me to kill him for you?”  
  
“You don’t do that anymore.” Peggy mumbled. Voice muffled by Bucky’s shoulder.  
  
Bucky chuckled. That was what was so great about Peggy. She let him joke about these things. He massaged her scalp to relieve some of her physical tension at least. “No. I don’t. But I could be convinced to make an exception for someone who insulted you like that.”  
  
Bucky could feel how evil her smile was even without being able to see it. “I told the managing partner. We’re dropping him as a client.”  
  
“That’ll do.” Bucky gave her a tight squeeze to end the hug. At least the people she worked for understood how lucky they were to have her. “You let me know if you need someone to teach any other idiots a lesson. Steve is great, but he’s too nice for that sort of thing.”  
  
They talked about lighter things while they ate. The weather. What movie they should watch this weekend. The book Bucky was editing. The budding romance between two of the junior associates in Peggy’s office. By the end of the meal Bucky had Peggy smiling and laughing thanks to a story about therapy dogs at the VA.  
  
Peggy's laugh always made Bucky happy. It was so unbridled and free. So, unlike her normal reserve. He grinned as he leaned back contentedly in his chair.  
  
“You’ve got something…” Peggy gestured to Bucky’s cheek.  
  
Bucky couldn’t feel anything, but he would fully believe that he had managed to get sauce on his face. Linguini was never his friend on that front. He wiped at the area Peggy had pointed to, but his hand came away clean.  
  
“Here. Let me.” Peggy came around the table so she could wipe the spot away.  
  
An energy buzzed between them. Bucky would not be surprised to see actual sparks crackling around the place where their skin touched. Peggy stroked her thumb over his cheek, gently circling the dip of his dimple. Slowly, with a look of fascination forming her mouth into a delicate ‘O’ she let her fingers drift over his lips, the cleft of his chin, along his jaw.  
  
Bucky stopped breathing. He’d never realised how gorgeous Peggy’s eyes were. Chestnut and warm honey. Eyes you could melt into. Eyes he really wanted to melt into.  
  
Before Bucky knew what was happening Peggy was in his lap and their lips were pressed together. Peggy’s hands were in his hair. Her mouth tasted like lemon and sunshine. It wasn’t just the pasta either. It was her. She was amazing.  
  
Bucky jerked away violently. He shouldn’t know what Peggy tasted like. She was amazing. She was also Steve’s.  
  
Peggy eased herself slowly out of his lap, perching on the edge of the table. “Oh. That was…”  
  
“Bad. That was bad.” Bucky’s heart thundered in his ears. He’d kissed Peggy. How much of an idiot was he? Of all the people he could kiss, Peggy was the worst possible choice.  
  
Peggy licked her lips delicately. “Bad was not the word I was going to use.”  
  
Bucky shook he head. Trying desperately to dislodge the memory of how good it had felt to have Peggy in his lap. “You’re Steve’s best girl. What else could it have been?”  
  
“I do hope I am Steve’s only girl.” Peggy said crisply smoothing the front of her skirt. Bucky would add damaging her pride to the list of things he needed to feel bad about. That list had gotten a lot longer today. “And I would call it one of the best first kisses I’ve ever had.”  
  
Bucky shoved his hand into his hair and tugged. The mild pain in his scalp helped to centre him. Now would be a very bad time to have a panic attack. He put his head between his knees, hyperventilating just a little. She was right. It had been electric. And he was a terrible friend for even thinking it. “Fuck. Okay. It was a good kiss. That doesn’t matter though. It was a mistake. I make those sometimes. My brain does stupid things. It’s broken and healing and sometimes I do stupid things while it’s doing that. Steve will understand. He's Steve, he always understands.”  
  
“Darling, you are going to work yourself into a lather and I won’t be held responsible.” Peggy cupped his chin in both hands and made him look up at her. “Take a deep breath.”  
  
“How are you this calm?” Bucky snapped. He wasn’t the only one who had messed up here. Peggy was dating Steve. Sweet, loyal, perfect Steve. How could she kiss someone else? Anyone else. Let alone a broken idiot like him.  
  
Peggy’s features softened. She smoothed his hair back from his face soothingly. “Everything is going to be fine. I'll talk to Steve when he gets home. You don’t have to worry about a thing.”


	3. September 27th

Bucky sat on the terrace, his feet up on the railing, a cold coke can in his hand. It was well past midnight. He'd taken off his prosthetic and change into pyjamas hours ago. He should be asleep. He couldn’t face even the idea of his bed. Sleep was for people who hadn’t completely betrayed their best and oldest friend. The lights of the city sparkled off the water in front of him. Thousands of people, going about their lives like his world hadn’t ended a couple of hours ago. Like he wasn’t a self-destructive idiot who had blown up his life and ruined the best relationships in his life for one kiss.  
  
He would start looking for a new place to live in the morning. Maybe Sam would let him crash on his couch for a while. Maybe not when he found out what he’d done. He could go back to his parents. It would kill him, but he could. Or Beca kept asking him to come visit her in Chicago. He could stay with her. She loved Steve like a brother and would never forgive Bucky for hurting him. But Bucky didn’t deserve forgiveness, so that wasn’t exactly a point against that plan.  
  
“Hey.” Steve’s deep warm voice sounded behind him. Interrupting Bucky’s spiralling panic.  
  
Bucky took a long sip of his coke. There were only a few times he wished he still drank. This was one of them. This conversation would be a lot easier if her were smashed. “Hey.”  
  
Steve leaned against the railing next to Bucky’s feet. Staring at a spot a few feet above Bucky’s head. His expression was strange. This whole night had been strange. “Heard you kissed Peggy.”  
  
Bucky rubbed the back of his neck. The last time he and Steve had fought it had been about volunteering for probable suicide missions. Bucky definitely didn’t have the moral high ground this time. “Yeah. Sorry about that man. I don’t know what happened.”  
  
“I think I do.” Steve cupped Bucky’s jaw in one big hand, making him look up. His expression had only gotten stranger.  
  
For the second time in the same day, Bucky found himself overwhelmed by a kiss. Slowly and methodically Steve took him apart with his mouth. There was a lot of emotion wrapped up in this kiss. A long smouldering fire roaring to life. Bucky fisted his hand in the front of Steve’s shirt. It was possible he was having a major psychotic break because of what had happened earlier. If he was, he wanted to remember every moment of it. It was a lot better than the reality that was going to come after.  
  
It was close to a full minuet before Steve pulled away and Bucky let him. His lips were bruised in a way he didn’t think he could imagine.  
  
“Okay.” Bucky’s brain wasn’t working. The words ‘Steve kissed me' running on a loop, overriding any more logical thoughts that were trying to form. “Starting to think I’m not the crazy one here.”  
  
“Telling me you haven’t thought about it?” Steve voice was husky as he rubbed his thumb along Bucky’s lower lip. The slight roughness of the pad felt amazing against the soft slightly tender skin.  
  
Bucky swallowed. Now he knew he wasn’t the crazy one. “I’ve been celibate for nearly three years. It would be easier to list the things I haven’t thought about. That doesn’t mean I’m going to blow up our friendship just to get my rocks off.”  
  
“Why does it have to blow up our friendship?” The breathlessness hadn’t fully left Steve’s voice. He still seemed slightly hypnotised by Bucky’s mouth. Like he was thinking about kissing him again. Bucky knew he was thinking about kissing Steve again. Stupid as that thought was.  
  
“A crazy hot night of passion with both of my roommates?” Bucky pulled Steve’s hand away from his face. It was too tempting. “That’s pretty much guaranteed to blow up our friendship.”  
  
“Yeah.” Steve licked his lips and smiled shyly. “That wasn’t exactly what I was proposing. I mean, it will be hot, but Peggy and I were thinking something slightly longer term than one crazy night.”  
  
Bucky blinked. That was not what he’d been expecting to hear. There was no way Steve had been home long enough them to have _that_ conversation. “You and Peggy were thinking…”  
  
Steve shrugged. He leaned back against the railing again, looking as guilty as Bucky felt. “It’s come up before. Peggy's known I find you attractive for years. She thinks you’re pretty damn hot too. The emotional stuff… come on, you know what we are to each other. Peggy and I talked about it a little before 'the shit hit the fan'. After, we agreed you weren’t in a good place and we didn’t want to do anything that would risk you freaking out and pushing us away.”  
  
This explanation was only confusing Bucky more. Peggy thought he was attractive. _Steve_ thought he was attractive. They had talked about inviting him in. Making him part of their storybook romance. “You… Years?... Why now?”  
  
Steve chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, this isn’t how I would have done things in an ideal world, but then you went a kissed Pegs. I think chips on the table is probably a better policy than ignore it and hope it goes away. You’re doing a lot better these days. Your therapist has been encouraging you to consider dating.”  
  
“You want to date me?” Bucky asked. It didn’t sound real. It sounded like an impossible dream. He wanted to date them. He wanted to be worthy to date the two most amazing people he knew. He wanted Steve and Peggy to want him back.  
  
Steve smiled and slipped his hand into Bucky’s. “Yeah Buck. We do.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky let Steve lead him to the mater bedroom. Peggy was sitting up in bed. Her arms wrapped around her knees. Her eyes looked shinier than normal. Bucky wondered if she had been crying. He hoped not. He hated the idea that he was the reason Peggy had cried. She’d always been the strong level-headed one. One of his few memories from waking up in the hospital after ‘the shit hit the fan’ was Steve crying while Peggy held him, when she’d seen he was awake she’d taken his hand too, told him it was all going to be alright.  
  
Bucky shuffled closer, hesitantly lowering himself on to the edge of their bed. He wanted Peggy to know that she hadn’t done anything wrong. Needed her to know. Even is this all went wrong, it was his fault, not hers. “Hi.”  
  
“Oh, James.” Peggy’s voice cracked. She was on the edge of crying at very least. His name, Peggy, and tears. It was a terrible combination. One he couldn’t let continue.  
  
Bucky cupped the back of her head and kissed her. The third surprise kiss today. The first one Bucky felt like he was in control of. One he did his best to fill with everything he had ever felt about Peggy and Steve. The same way Steve had filled their kiss with everything he hadn’t been able to say.  
  
“James.” Peggy breathed curling her fingers in Bucky’s hair. His name sounded a lot better this time.  
  
Bucky pressed their foreheads together. How had the three best kisses of his life all happened in the past six hours. He'd sworn off kissing after 'the shit hit the fan'. He came with too much baggage to put it all on one other person. Only if this worked, he wasn’t putting it all on one other person. He was spreading it out. And they were the people who had been dealing with most of his baggage for years anyway. “You’re sure this is a good idea? It isn’t one of Steve’s romantic daydreams?”  
  
The fingers in his hair tightened. Holding him close. “I’m sure. You fit with us.”  
  
Bucky closed his eyes and breathed in the safety of the moment. Peggy wasn’t a romantic the way Steve was. She wouldn’t lie to him. And she wouldn’t say she was sure if she hadn’t fully considered the ramifications. This could work. It wouldn’t be easy, but nothing worth doing ever was.  
  
When he opened his eyes again Steve was standing at the foot of the bed. He looked tired, nervous, and happy all at the same time.  
  
Steve shifted from foot to foot. “I know we have a lot more talking we need to do if this is going to work. But it is late, and I have to get up early and go back to the office if the company is going to stop the Ultron project going down in flames like a damn meteor. Can we all just go to sleep and deal with the hard questions this weekend?”  
  
“Yeah. Of course.” Bucky smiled reassuringly. Bucky knew that if he wanted to talk now Steve would go without sleep. That if he needed Steve tomorrow, he would tell Stark to shove his crumbling project and stay with him. The same way he always had. Steve was there for him. Steve would always be there for him. And Peggy would be there right along side him.  
  
“Oh, thank God.” Steve practically belly flopped onto the bed. His arm landing across Bucky, his hand on Peggy’s side.  
  
Bucky froze. Steve had said all go to sleep. Bucky hadn’t even considered the possibility he meant all sleep here.  
  
Peggy noticed. She always noticed. Gentle fingers tucked his hair behind his ears. “Do you not want to sleep here tonight, darling? You don’t have to.”  
  
“I do. It’s just…” They were dealing with how things were going to work later. Didn’t that mean they should act like nothing had changed for the time being? Things had changed though. He knew what they both tasted like for one thing. They knew he wanted to kiss them for another.  
  
“Just nothing. You want to be here. We want you here. That means it isn’t one of the hard questions.” Peggy said with her normal crisp efficiency.  
  
“Okay.” Bucky whispered the word into the air between them. Peggy was the best intelligence officer, the best lawyer, and one of the smartest people he knew. He trusted her assessment above anyone else, including Steve. If she said it was simple it was simple.  
  
Steve manhandled him into a better spooning position. Peggy snuggled in into his chest. The three of them curled together in the dark, breathing slowing. Being held like this, cradled safe between his favourite people, Bucky felt more at peace than he could remember.  
  
“Oh.” Peggy half sat up as she realised something. “In all the bedlam, I forgot to ask Steve about work.”  
  
Steve grumbled something that sounded like _international relations, infrastructure spending_ and _reliable high-speed internet_ , it was hard to tell with his face muffled between Bucky’s shoulder blades.  
  
Bucky cuddled Peggy closer. They always told each other about the important things that happened during the day. Bucky doubted anything that Steve had done at work could compare to what had happened after he got home. It was sweet that she still wanted to check. “There will be time in the morning. I'll make coffee while you two get dressed.”  
  
This time Steve’s grumble sounded like _coffee good, sleep better._  
  
Peggy reached over Bucky to shove him playfully in the shoulder. “Go to sleep then, you idiot.”  
  
Bucky hid his smile in Peggy’s soft curls. She was right. He did fit here. Closed his eyes and fell into a deep dreamless sleep.


End file.
